Metaphysical Help for Holiday Loneliness
By Stephanie Kato, Metaphysical Intuitive Healer
As if holiday loneliness doesn’t feel bad enough, viewing festive Instagram and Facebook posts by people sharing celebratory pictures can make lonely people feel even lonelier. Is there a way to transmute feelings of isolation and alienation into joy and blessings?
I believe our experiences are a way for us to learn how to recognize our self-worth. If you are singing the holiday blues, join me as I present some situations that create lonely feelings – followed by some proactive tips on shifting those perspectives. Practice these tips during the entire holiday season and notice how much happier you feel!
Don’t judge a (social media) book by its cover
Sometimes we look at someone’s post and assume they live a charmed life…and then use this perception to feel jealous because we live differently. Or maybe we feel sorry for, or bad about ourselves because our own life doesn’t measure up by comparison. The whole reason we compare ourselves to others is an excuse to beat ourselves up and feel unworthy. How often do you ever compare yourself or your life to someone else and feel better about yourself?
Tip: Host your own party with friends. I know my friends love me and are often so busy in their own lives that I don’t hear from them. When I want company, I don’t take it personally–I lead with compassion for their busy lives and I ask for what I need. I take charge by inviting friends over for a game or movie night and create my own fun!
“I create my own joyful life.”
Single during the holidays
Holidays without a partner may be the biggest reason we feel lonely. Company parties, holiday dinners and romantic movies provide opportunities to notice we are missing a plus one, and we end up feeling sad.
Tip: Celebrate with your inner child. Within each of us exists the younger part of us that is still very much alive. How can we tell? The next time you experience feelings of loneliness and being left out–take a breath, close your eyes and notice how old you feel at that moment. It might surprise you to know that you feel quite young! Recall what was happening in your life during this time: did you feel lonely at this young age? What was your relationship with your parents, friends, and family at this age? If you recognize a correlation, invite your inner child to go play with you. Does your city have an outdoor skating rink? Take him/her skating! Or go to a toy store and buy a special gift for your little one. Connecting with the little, lonely part of you can really shift sad feelings to one of joy and happiness!
“Playtime with my inner child is the most fun time!”
The Slow Down
Holiday seasons are responsible for a decrease in many industries. If work provides a distraction from lonely feelings, lack of work can shine a light on the darkness we feel within.
Tip: Use this time to connect in. One of the biggest reasons for loneliness comes from feelings of disconnection to our spiritual self. If you are a religious or spiritual person and believe in a Higher Power, now is the time to connect in whatever way is meaningful for you. Sometimes our minds believe that a higher source is looking out for us but our hearts don’t trust it. This occurs because our lives feel disappointing and we conclude we are not really loved after all. If you are atheist or agnostic, you can connect to your own higher self–the part of you that knows you are worthy simply because you exist. Spend time each day connecting in meditation or prayer, and you may observe that you feel lighter and more joyful.
“Connecting with my higher self dispels loneliness.”
Holiday Happiness is for others, not me
It can appear everyone else is having the time of their lives and we accept this perception as truth. Reality check? It’s just not accurate. I have compassion for this perception and can offer this very helpful tip:
Tip: Practice daily gratitude. Try an experiment? When you notice you feel sad and lonely, think about areas in your life you feel grateful for. Really get into it and immerse yourself in gratitude. Then try to feel the sadness. I bet you can’t do it. Gratitude and despair cannot co-exist. Think about that for a minute. This is the greatest tip of all. Practice daily gratitude and those lonely holiday feelings will subside…hopefully beyond the holiday season!
“My life is joyful when I feel grateful.”